http://www.theindependentfilmschool.com

Yes, it’s sent alright but definitely not from the kingdom above,
Breaking His Commandments is not what God considers love,
Programs where stories center around exploited sexual journeys,
These are role models for housewives, doctors and attorneys?

Instead of demonstrating procedure for legal advice or dispensing meds,
They’re overly consumed with who’s sleeping with whom & in what bed?
What language, remember thinking only in the streets profanity is said?
The casual use of mind altering drugs and alcohol that buzz your head.

Women were not created for swollen lips & black eyes,
Neither was their purpose to be lower class or despised,
She’s supposedly man’s companion not his punching bag,
Girls are treated by boys the way mom is treated by dad.

And it is not always what goes on from home that we see,
Even more so what’s seen in moves and programs on TV,
Understand, action will always speak louder than words,
Now add to the process negative dialogue that is heard.

Producers, directors, writers it’s time to lose filth and dirt,
Create quality films and series with less sex, pain and hurt,
Whatever happened to the good guys win, bad guys loose?
Shown and promoted in entertainment is what you choose.

Abuse in every country is running rampant to an all time high,
Feature films, television, music videos is the main reason why,
Certainly not all but most of what’s viewed is played out in life,
Many in the audience are unable to distinguish fantasy from life.

The entertainment industry needs to be shepherds to God’s sheep,
Smoking, drinking, drugs, promiscuity are the Goliath’s of defeat,
Biggest problems arise leaving common sense out of the equation,
Because too many people allow fiction to govern their imagination.

What about feature length films when going to the big screen?
If you’re old enough to read this you know exactly what I mean,
How about the ratings? PG 13, R, M for mature audience or X,
Without violence and nudity, it’s something studios hurriedly reject.

Like music with lyrics preaching murder, racism, plus hate,
Making light of violent crimes like robbery, assault and rape,
Television should help positively direct, educate, mold, shape,
Whether they are children, adults, born fifty years early or late.

As Christians we have to be particular about what we watch,
Why is the bad guy glamorized instead of the good ones or cops?
If a professional, could your license be suspended or revoked?
Using insensitive language, gestures, telling an inappropriate joke?

Nothing is funny and laughable for the minority on the other end,
When coming from someone looked up to as a mentor or friend,
The president of a company, your supervisor, the so-called boss,
An insensitive statement & years of progressive cultivation is lost.

Too often people place an importance only on what visuals they see,
Instead of the word of God from the bible by not taking time to read,
All of these things are choices and they are yours alone to make,
Why choose the wrong one when you already know it’s a mistake?

Scenario, there’s a knock at the door, you answer, it’s Jesus Christ,
“Hi, I shed blood, pain, humiliation, died for you, lets watch TV tonight,”
Do you run quickly to change the channel before the Lord takes a seat?
Or lay back in your second favorite chair, relax and kick up your feet?

Great comment. I really am with you on this one. My thought is that if women don’t support other women we are done for because guys sure as hell support each other. Let’s make a list of our favorite female characters.

A few days ago in my local paper I read “an on the street type ” interview at a movie theater with a handful of movie goers. One woman apologized and said she was embarrassed that her favorite recent movie was “Mamma Mia!” and even more embarrassed to have to admit that she was going to see “My Live in Ruins”. ALL the women – and of course, all the men interviewed – named male characters when asked the question “If you could be a character from a movie who would you be?” I couldn’t believe it! This was in San Francisco!

We do not need to educate men so much as we need women to come together and support each other and ourselves.

Boy do I relate. My first attempt at making a feature, this is exactly what happened. I only sent out contribution letters to people I thought cared about me and wanted to see my dreams come true. I learned soon enough that if you’re female and a filmmaker, most people won’t support your dreams.

In that same year I saw five of my male counterparts raise money in the exact same way, successfully, and went on to make their features.

I guess we’re supposed to stay home and iron shirts!

After my first attempt, I fell into a long, deep depression. I cut a lot of people out of my life. Now, I feel like I’m returning to myself, and trying to find a way toward making a feature again. I don’t know how, but reading your letter gives me hope. Good luck.

To keep hope, I take a two-pronged approach:

1) We need to refuse to feel bad about ourselves. We can’t make progress as long as we’re vulnerable to believing the misinformation about women that we’ve stewed in all our lives. We each need to know that we are intelligent, significant, wanted, and uniquely beautiful. This may require some tears and grief, to heal from what we’ve internalized. If we really truly knew how good we are, we would be unstoppable. So for the sake of our cause: we each have to quit feeling deficient or lacking in any way what so ever.

2) We need to lovingly train men to be our allies, and know that it’s what they really want. They feel so bad about sexism that they just shut down when we take the tone of blame. If we assume their goodness, they rise to our expectations. We can’t win this battle without them joining us, and the good news is that we don’t need to.

I knew a guy whose sexism was driving me up a wall. One day I asked him: “Have you ever witnessed a woman being treated badly?” Within minutes he was talking about growing up with a single mom, and all the hardships that he watched her face. When he spoke about how hard she worked without ever getting promoted, he broke into tears. I kid you not. He was crying in my arms by the end of the conversation. Men carry so much heartache from having watched women get mistreated, and they never get to talk about it.

I have a dream of one day compiling a book in which I interview men in Hollywood about instances in which they witnessed sexism, and what advice they might give to men and women in handling those scenarios. I never ask men about their own sexism because it’s too hard for them to talk about it. They feel super guilty, shut down, go into denial mode, and we, in turn, get mad about it! if we can leave out the blame and expect men to want to assist us, they come to life.

My book will be called: Women in Hollywood and Our Allies

My broader question for you, Melissa, and this blog’s other readers, is: how do you keep the faith while you do this work? How do you avoid short-circuiting with frustration when you behold the scope of the problem? There are some times, especially when I read something like this from a relatively successful filmmaker of 20 years, when all I want to do is give up.

We’re also sponsoring a female-directed film at the LA Film Festival next week, “35 Shots of Rum”. http://www.canow.org/canoworg/2009/06/join-ca-now-for-35-shots-of-rum.html

Indiegogo.com is a site that helps filmmakers network and try to generate funds. Some people on the site are having great success, others, not so much. I do believe the site is an excellent way to try and get things done. It’s also all we have, at this point.